YAHOO RADIO

Today is Friday, that means I play the music at my desk a little louder and rock out with a little more intensity. Today I am listening to my own cutsom station that I created at Yahoo Radio. If they throw in a song I don't like I rate it as "never play again" and it won't come back. I got to choose all my faves and that's what I hear all day long - no commercials. Also a HUGE SHOUT OUT to the man with the music: Perplexio! Thank you!

Yahoo Radio
Classic Rock
Guitar Greats

Jeff at Imagine Echoes has something fun over on his blog, I'm trying to think of some of songs to add to his list.

Michael Hutchence Movie?

Michael Hutchence has a special place in my heart and memory. I just heard that they may be making a movie of his life starring Johnny Depp.

I have mixed feelings about this. First, yes, Johnny would be the only person (other than maybe Val Kilmer but everyone would associate him with Jim M.) to play this role.

What side of the story are they going to tell? How will we know its the truth? And how will this affect and his family? Why all of a sudden is this surfacing after all these years (because "INXS" needed some money and went on a stupid reality show to replace the one member that made them who they were? No bitterness here.)

And, the biggest question I have:

WHO IS GOING TO MAKE A PROFIT OFF THIS FILM?

I have a big problem with this film being made in the first place, if only for personal reasons. I really don't want to re-live his death. I know, I know...I didn't even know the guy, but I felt like I did. Very few people seem to have realized what an incredible artist he was, the lyrics he wrote are amazing to me. I wish I would have written them. Many of his words hit close to home.

There is a lot of controversy surrounding his death. He committed suicide while in a hotel room. There were rumors of auto-eroticism or a conspiracy because of Sir Bob Geldoff's child custody case with Michael's girlfriend. Here is the very sad twist...she died of a drug overdose a few years later. What does that mean? Who looked into this? Was it investigated properly? How does Sir Bob feel now that he has his child but her mother is dead? Was this a coincidence?

The fact was - he hung himself with his belt and they found him there, kneeling on the floor, naked and dead.

When I heard the news, I wanted it to be a bad dream. I wanted them to turn back the clock so he could change his mind. I remember suddenly identifying with a generation years younger than me, who heard the same thing about their "idol", Kurt Cobain, in '94.

There were millions who loved and understood Kurt and his message. They say that's one reason he "left us". He never wanted Nirvana to be "popular" he wanted them to make a difference. I think he used his suicide as a very strong statement.

Not too many people even know who Michael is when I mention his name. It was a news story that lasted a day here in the States and was forgotten. I can't forget him because of the way his songs made me feel (and still do).

Anyhow, the point is....I think I know why he did it. He was tired. He was depressed. He was hopeless. Simple as that. That's why most people kill themselves. They can't take life anymore. The pain becomes unbearable. There is no hope for tomorrow. Every day is dark and dreary. The real question is not why did he kill himself, but why did his life become so bleak? He was talented, famous, rich, HANDSOME, sexy. Yet, none of that matters. When you are depressed it just does NOT matter. You have lost the will to continue living. The only people who truly understand have already pulled the trigger, tied the noose, took the pills or slashed their wrists.

I sometimes wonder about those famous people that got labeled with "accidental drug overdose?". Undoubtedly some of them were intended suicides. Some may have been murder.

Is it better to leave the world thinking you screwed up and OD'd or that you purposely ended it? What if someone killed you, and no one sought justice for your death.

What bout Maryilyn Monroe and Judy Garland? Or Keith Moon and Brian Jones? What about Jim, Jimi and Janis? Chris Farley and John Belushi? What really happened?

I guess we will never know for sure.

If you read this, go put on some of the real INXS in honor of Michael - Suicide Blonde would be perfect for the occasion.

Poetry

One of my faithful readers asked if I would share some of my poetry. Wow. That's like asking me to stand naked and bare my soul. But what the hell.

My life has been an open book lately.

Here you go, Jeff, if you like it I have more, all depressing love poems.

This is dedicated to my muse....the man who melted my heart and got me to write again.


I wish I were an artist, I'd draw his haunting face.
Those dark violet eyes that melt my heart and touch my soul.
The lips, full of sensuality, yet asking for an innocent kiss.
His soft gentle hands that I long to caress my face.

I’d capture his uniqueness, his handsomeness, his intelligence…

His personlity would be hard to sketch, so extraorinaire and complex.

Why does he have this affect on me?

So unlike my sensibility.

Against my discernment…yet willingly...I fell in love with him.

I read his words and am transported to another time and place.

I am captivated by his stories and touched by his memories.

If I could put his face, his hands, his essence, on paper,
Perhaps he would not haunt me day and night.
His stare could no longer affect me in my dreams.
He would have no longer have a hold on my heart and my desires.

My longings for him would cease to create passion and sadness.

But also the joy, the erotic desire and love he provokes in me would die.

He invited the little girl in me out to play.
The woman in me to unleash her lust.

Would he be smiling in my drawing?
Would there be a tear in his eye?

How can I draw the devotion I feel toward him?
How do I describe something I have never felt before?

I would rather die than live without knowing him this way.
I wasn't even alive before he found me.

I want to create a lasting peice of art, a portrait fit for a King.
That forever will adorn the canvas in my heart and never fade.

I can't end this poem...I can't because I don't want it to ever end

Is This Tom Petty's Last Summer Tour?

According to this article in Rolling Stone, it is

Dear John

Dear John,
My heart hurts from loving the wrong man. I am in deeper than I intended to go. I can't really discuss this with my friends "down here" because they don't understand me at all. They think I'm going to get hurt, but if you live in fear of that, you'll never risk love. They call me a hopeless romantic, a dreamer - but hey, I'm not the only one.

Wishing you were still here,
Layla

Happy Birthday, Bob

An amazing human being.